21 Jun 2024

Oh, we can dream. Believe me.

But perhaps today is just a different kind of day. The kind where I don’t answer questions but examine them… when I question the question itself.

Many times questions are statements.

This one seems to want to say something about self-belief… or potential.

And here I am in two minds. Try as I might, despite my best attempts at being a good version of me… two simultaneous streams of thought has a tug of war in my soul.

Part of me, yes, cheers it on. As long as there is potential there is hope, right? Why not? Why not see the possibilities in things? Why not view the world through the filter of one who would make it all better if he could? Why not make something positive of it – indeed. Something worthwhile, and beautiful. This is the part I let win in my calendar, to rule my schedule, to drive my actions as much and as far as possible.

And there is another part, often silenced, that simply looks at potential as something intrinsically unrealised. The part that asks how did it get to this in the first place. The part that says possibilities are worth less than the wind they are not printed on. That visions mean nothing without backbreaking work to back it up. That hope itself is empty. That positive designs are as forced and empty as marketing presentations. And while it must be carefully stored and handled, this darker self, it might be more accurate in seeing ‘potential’ as the bullshit it is.

Don’t fight it, don’t try to heal it. Accept it. Experience it. Let it flow in, and through and past.

Then get back to the calendar and get to work.